The idea of planning your own funeral might feel unusual at first, but in many ways, it’s not very different from making a Will, deciding on retirement plans, or setting aside money for your children’s future. It’s about taking control and making sure that when the time comes, your loved ones don’t have to make difficult decisions on your behalf.
For many people, the thought of planning ahead is triggered by experience. If you’ve had to arrange a funeral for a parent, partner, or close friend, you’ll know just how many choices there are and how hard it can be to make them while dealing with grief. That realisation alone can be enough to prompt you to put your own affairs in order.
Other times, it’s a life milestone that sparks the decision. Perhaps your children have flown the nest and you’re looking forward to a new chapter, or you’ve reached retirement and have more time to think about the future. Whatever your reason, taking action now brings both practical benefits and emotional reassurance.
Why plan ahead?
We make plans for so many stages of life, from the first home we buy to the way we’ll spend our retirement. Your funeral may not be something you want to dwell on, but it’s one event that will happen, and having a plan in place means your wishes will be known and respected.
It also means your loved ones will have clear guidance when they need it most. Instead of having to guess at what you might have wanted, they can focus on supporting one another, knowing the big decisions are already taken care of.
Planning ahead can also make financial sense. Funeral costs have risen steadily over the years, outpacing inflation. Choosing a pre-paid plan now means locking in the cost of your chosen arrangements at today’s prices, protecting your family from future increases.
And there’s another benefit — peace of mind. Many people who’ve planned ahead say they feel a sense of relief once everything is organised. It’s one more important thing ticked off your list, leaving you free to enjoy the years ahead.
Peace of mind for you and your family
When a loved one dies, there’s often a scramble to organise the service, notify friends and family, and make countless decisions in a short space of time. Doing this while grieving can be overwhelming.
By making your choices now, you remove much of that pressure. Your family will know exactly what to do, and they won’t have to worry about how to pay for it. If you’ve chosen a funeral plan, they also won’t be caught out by price rises in the years ahead.
It’s a final gift you can give to the people you love — the knowledge that everything is taken care of, exactly as you wanted.
A farewell that reflects you
Funeral planning doesn’t have to be a sombre task. It can be a chance to think about how you’d like to be remembered. You can choose the music you’d like played, the readings that reflect your values, or the stories you’d want shared.
Perhaps you’d like your favourite song played as people arrive, or a reading from a poem that has always inspired you. Maybe you want to hold a gathering somewhere meaningful, such as your garden, a local village hall, or by the sea.
When you take the time to personalise your farewell, you create an event that feels like a true reflection of your life. That can be incredibly comforting for your friends and family, and it ensures your farewell is as individual as you are.
Talking about your wishes
Starting a conversation about your funeral may feel awkward, but it’s often easier than you think. You might start by talking about a funeral you’ve attended recently — what you liked, what you would do differently — and use that as a way into discussing your own preferences.
You don’t have to cover everything in one conversation. Instead, think of it as an ongoing discussion you can revisit over time. This gives family members a chance to ask questions, and it allows you to refine your ideas as things change.
The most important thing is that your wishes are clear, so no one is left unsure of what to do when the time comes.
Writing it down
Even if you’ve spoken to your loved ones, it’s essential to have your wishes in writing. This removes any doubt and helps prevent disagreements.
Keep a copy somewhere easy to find, alongside your will and other important documents. You could also give a copy to your chosen executor or a trusted family member. That way, there’s no confusion, and your instructions can be followed exactly.
For more guidance and information, take a look at our free guide on putting your affairs in order.
How to plan your own funeral in 7 steps
1. Decide between burial or cremation.
Think about which option feels right for you, and whether you’d like a service beforehand. You might choose:
- A church service followed by burial or cremation
- A service at the crematorium
- A graveside ceremony in a cemetery or woodland burial site
- A memorial service after a private burial or cremation
- A direct cremation, with a separate celebration of life at another time and place
2. Choose whether you’d like a viewing.
Some families find comfort in visiting their loved one in a chapel of rest before the funeral, while others prefer not to. Deciding this now removes uncertainty later.
3. Select readings, music, and images.
The words and music you choose will help set the tone of your farewell. Whether you prefer something traditional, uplifting, or deeply personal, your choices will help tell your story.
4. Decide what should happen with your ashes (if choosing cremation).
You might want them buried in a family plot, scattered in a favourite place, or kept in a special urn at home.
5. Choose a venue for the ceremony and/or gathering.
This could be a place of worship, a crematorium chapel, a hotel function room, or somewhere outdoors. Think about the atmosphere you’d like to create.
6. Research providers and costs.
Not all services are priced the same, so it’s worth comparing options to make sure you get the service you want within your budget.
7. Decide how your funeral will be paid for.
This could be through savings, life insurance, or a funeral plan. Make sure your family knows where the funds will come from.
Paying for your funeral in advance
You have several options:
- Savings: Flexible, but relies on funds being available at the time.
- Life insurance or Over 50s plans: Can help cover costs, but may not match the full amount needed.
- Funeral plan: Fixes the cost at today’s prices and sets out your wishes in detail.
At Pure Cremation, we offer simple, cremation-only funerals that include everything needed for a dignified farewell without extras you don’t want or need. Your price is fixed from day one, so no matter how costs rise in the future, your family won’t pay more.
Personalising your farewell
A meaningful farewell often reflects the life, values, and passions of the person being honoured. Here are some areas to consider:
- Location: Where would you like the ceremony or memorial to take place?
- Coffin or urn: What style feels right for you?
- Attendees: Who would you like to invite?
- People involved: Would you like specific friends or relatives to give readings, carry the coffin, or create a photo display?
- Music and readings: Which songs, poems, or prayers reflect your personality?
- Flowers and decorations: Do you have a favourite flower or colour scheme?
- Personal touches: Could hobbies, achievements, or travel be represented through displays or mementoes?
- Online memorials: Would you like a dedicated web page for sharing photos and memories?
Including family and friends in the planning process can be a source of comfort, helping them feel connected and involved.
Making it simple and affordable
Without a plan, families sometimes feel pressure to spend more than is necessary, often in the hope of “doing the right thing.” By setting out your wishes now, you control both the style and the budget of your farewell.
Pure Cremation offers flexible payment options, whether you’d prefer to pay in a single sum or through monthly instalments.
If you’d like to learn more, our friendly team is here to help. Call us free on 0800 470 23 93, or request a free guide to explore whether our funeral plans feel right for you.
